Fake / Real

FAKE FRIENDS: Never ask for food.

REAL FRIENDS: is the reason you have no food.



FAKE FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr / Mrs

REAL FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD/MOM



FAKE FRIENDS: bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong

REAL FRIENDS: Would sit next to you saying 'Dawg ... we screwed up... but that was fun!'



FAKE FRIENDS: never seen you cry

REAL FRIENDS: cry with you



FAKE FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back

REAL FRIENDS: keep your stuff so long they forget it's yours



FAKE FRIENDS: know a few things about you

REAL FRIENDS: Could write a book about you with direct quotes from you



FAKE FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing

REAL FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds butt that left you



FAKE FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door

REAL FRIENDS: Walk right in and say 'I'M HOME!'



FAKE FRIENDS: Are for awhile

REAL FRIENDS: Are for life



FAKE FRIENDS: will talk bad to the person who talks bad about you.

REAL FRIENDS: Will knock the person out that talked bad about you



FAKE FRIENDS: Would ignore this

REAL FRIENDS: Will send this to all their real friends and hope to get it back!



If you were killed today, I'm sorry I wouldn't be able to come to your funeral, because I'd be in jail for killing the person who did it.


First, I wanted to let you know that I love you to death & think you are amazing! Second, if I don't get this back I understand...







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10 COMMANDMENTS OF MARRIAGE

10 COMMANDMENTS OF MARRIAGE


Commandment 1. Marriages are made in heaven.But so again, are thunder and lightning.

Commandment 2. If you want your spouse to listen andpay strict attention to every word you say,talk in your sleep.

Commandment 3. Marriage is grand --and divorce is at least 100 grand!

Commandment 4. Married life is very frustrating.In the first year of marriage,the man speaks and the woman listens.In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens.In the third year, they both speak andthe neighbors listen.

Commandment 5. When a man opens the door of his carfor his wife, you can be sure of one thing:Either the car is new or the wife is.

Commandment 6. Marriage is when a man and womanbecome as one; the trouble starts whenthey try to decide which one.

Commandment 7. Before marriage, a man will lie awakeall night thinking about something yousaid. After marriage, he will fall asleepbefore you finish.

Commandment 8. Every man wants a wife who is beautiful,understanding, economical, and a goodcook. But the law allows only one wife.

Commandment 9. Every woman wants a man who is handsome,understanding, economical and a consideratelover, but again, the law allows onlyone husband.

Commandment 10. Man is incomplete until he marries.After that, he is finished.

Bonus Commandment story. A long married couple came upon a wishing well.
The wife leaned over, made a wish and threw in a penny.
The husband decided to make a wish too.But he leaned over too much, fell into the well, and drowned.

The wife was stunned for a moment but then smiled, "It really works!"

Why Women Cry? Plz read this.................

Why Women Cry


Watch her eyes

A little boy asked his mother, "Why are you crying?" "Because I'm a woman," she told him.

"I don't understand," he said.

His Mom just hugged him and said, "And you never will."

Later the little boy asked his father, "Why does mother seem to cry for no reason?"

"All women cry for no reason," was all his dad could say.

The little boy grew up and became a man, still wondering why women cry.

Finally he put in a call to God. When God got on the phone, he asked, "God, why do women cry so easily?"

God said:

"When I made the woman she had to be special.

I made her shoulders strong enough to carry the weight of the world,

yet gentle enough to give comfort.

I gave her an inner strength to endure childbirth and the rejection that many times comes from her children.

I gave her a hardness that allows her to keep going when everyone else gives up, and take care of her family through sickness and fatigue without complaining.

I gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all circumstances, even when her child has hurt her very badly.

I gave her strength to carry her husband through his faults and fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart.

I gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly.

And finally, I gave her a tear to shed. This is hers exclusively to use whenever it is needed."

"You see my son," said God, "the beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair.

The beauty of a woman must be seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart - the place where love resides."

Please send this to five beautiful women you know today. If you do, something good will happen - You will boost another woman's self-esteem!

Or

To men who appreciate them!