If you stop and think about it, what we call the "future" is really only a product of our imagination. Each of us imagines the future out of our hopes and fears. If we feel good about ourselves, then we tend to focus on our hopes and dreams. On the other hand, if we don't feel good about ourselves,
we project our fears into the picture of the future, which we view in our heads.
Too often, we tend to focus on worst case scenarios of what might happen to us. Unfortunately, the more we focus on this and visualize the awful events that we imagine in our heads, the more likely they will come to pass.
However, if you can begin to imagine a more enjoyable, fulfilling and desirable "future" and to picture it on a regular basis, you will find yourself drawn toward bringing this "future" into being.
Once you believe that this vision of your "future" is possible, then you can really commit to creating it and you'll begin to take action. As you see yourself acting with greater optimism, enthusiasm, and purpose, you will become like a magnet, attracting into your life the ideas, people, resources and opportunities
that you need to bring about this vision.
Timepass Short Jokes
Timepass Short Jokes
(1) An Ant saw strawberry juice & shouted: "Aaaah at last I visited the red sea!!!!"
(2) Two cockroaches were admitted in ICU,
The first Cockroach asked: "Raid???"
The second Cockroach replied: "No, Shoe!!!"
(3) An NRI sent a blank sms to his wife, why?
He didn't want to talk to her!!!
(4) A man hit his brand new car in to the wall, why?
He wanted to test whether the airbags are working!!!
(5) Policeman caught a drunk man & asked: "Why your eyes are red?",
The drunk man replied: "Actually i drunk tomato sauce while i was sleeping!!!"
(6) Two mad people were fighting on motorcycle, why?
They were arguing about 'who will sit near the window'!!!
(1) An Ant saw strawberry juice & shouted: "Aaaah at last I visited the red sea!!!!"
(2) Two cockroaches were admitted in ICU,
The first Cockroach asked: "Raid???"
The second Cockroach replied: "No, Shoe!!!"
(3) An NRI sent a blank sms to his wife, why?
He didn't want to talk to her!!!
(4) A man hit his brand new car in to the wall, why?
He wanted to test whether the airbags are working!!!
(5) Policeman caught a drunk man & asked: "Why your eyes are red?",
The drunk man replied: "Actually i drunk tomato sauce while i was sleeping!!!"
(6) Two mad people were fighting on motorcycle, why?
They were arguing about 'who will sit near the window'!!!
When you meet Acquaintances / Friends...
1. At the movies: When you meet acquaintances/friends...
Stupid Question:-
Hey, what are you doing here?
Answer:-
Dont u know, I sell tickets in black over here..
2. In the bus: A heavy lady wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet...
Stupid Question:-
Sorry, did that hurt?
Answer:-
No, not at all, I'm on local anesthesia.....why don't you try again.
3. At a funeral: One of the teary-eyed people ask...
Stupid Question:-
Why, why him, of all people.
Answer:-
Why? Would it rather have been you?
4. At a restaurant: When you ask the waiter
Stupid Question:-
Is ! the "Butter Paneer Masala" dish good??
Answer:-
No, its terrible and made of adulterated cement. We occassionaly also spit in it.
5. At a family get-together: When some distant aunt meets you after years...
Stupid Question:-
Munna, Chickoo, you've become so big.
Answer:-
Well you haven't particularly shrunk yourself.
6. When a friend announces her wedding, and you ask...
Stupid Question:-
Is the guy you're marrying good?
Answer:-
No,he's a miserable wife-beating , insensitive lout...it's just the money.
7. When you get woken up at midnight by a phone call...
Stupid Question:-
Sorry. were you sleeping?
Answer:-
No. I was doing research on whether the Zulu tribes in Africa marry or not. You thought I was sleeping....you dumb witted moron.
8. When you see a friend/colleague with evidently shorter hair...
Stupid Question:-
Hey have you had a haircut?
Answer:-
No, its autumn and I'm shedding......
9. At the dentist when he's sticking pointed objects in your mouth...
Stupid Question:-
Tell me if it hurts?
Answer:-
No it wont. It will just bleed.
10. You are smoking a cigarette and a cute woman asks...
Stupid Question:-
Oh, so you smoke.
Answer:-
Gosh, it's a miracle .......it was a piece of chalk and now it's in flames!!!
Stupid Question:-
Hey, what are you doing here?
Answer:-
Dont u know, I sell tickets in black over here..
2. In the bus: A heavy lady wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet...
Stupid Question:-
Sorry, did that hurt?
Answer:-
No, not at all, I'm on local anesthesia.....why don't you try again.
3. At a funeral: One of the teary-eyed people ask...
Stupid Question:-
Why, why him, of all people.
Answer:-
Why? Would it rather have been you?
4. At a restaurant: When you ask the waiter
Stupid Question:-
Is ! the "Butter Paneer Masala" dish good??
Answer:-
No, its terrible and made of adulterated cement. We occassionaly also spit in it.
5. At a family get-together: When some distant aunt meets you after years...
Stupid Question:-
Munna, Chickoo, you've become so big.
Answer:-
Well you haven't particularly shrunk yourself.
6. When a friend announces her wedding, and you ask...
Stupid Question:-
Is the guy you're marrying good?
Answer:-
No,he's a miserable wife-beating , insensitive lout...it's just the money.
7. When you get woken up at midnight by a phone call...
Stupid Question:-
Sorry. were you sleeping?
Answer:-
No. I was doing research on whether the Zulu tribes in Africa marry or not. You thought I was sleeping....you dumb witted moron.
8. When you see a friend/colleague with evidently shorter hair...
Stupid Question:-
Hey have you had a haircut?
Answer:-
No, its autumn and I'm shedding......
9. At the dentist when he's sticking pointed objects in your mouth...
Stupid Question:-
Tell me if it hurts?
Answer:-
No it wont. It will just bleed.
10. You are smoking a cigarette and a cute woman asks...
Stupid Question:-
Oh, so you smoke.
Answer:-
Gosh, it's a miracle .......it was a piece of chalk and now it's in flames!!!
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